I am not going to soften the blow here. Unequivocally, YES. You should leave your narcissistic significant other. Yes you need to leave. Why? I have so many reasons, but the biggest reason is you. You can never be completely ALL YOU, fully committed to the best you can be, while in a relationship with a narcissist. Why. Because life with a narcissist is all about:

Appeasing them
Satiating them
Managing them
Taking care of them
Assuaging them
Accepting the abuse of you, and your children if you have them, by them.

There is NO SPACE for you. There is no time for you. There is no place for YOU (or your children if you have them).

Can a narcissist change? Can a narcissist be cured?

Well according to this Psychology Today article by Elinor Greenberg, Ph.D., the answer to that question is, “Yes” if the following conditions are met.

Yes if you can find a therapist that specializes in NPD
Yes if the narcissist actually accepts going to therapy
Yes if the narcissist accepts that they have NPD
Yes if the narcissist accepts therapy in relation to their NPD
Yes if you can endure the 5 to 10 years required for psychotherapy for the narcissist to be “cured” of their NPD.

While 1 is possible, 2-5 are as close to possible as me becoming the next President of the United States of America or pigs flying. So, in conclusion, unequivocally, “YES” you should crush the narcissist because any additional moment you spend with a narcissist is:

Another moment of losing you
Another moment that adversely impacts your mental, emotional and PHYSICAL health
Another moment of enabling them
Another moment of deepening your addiction
Another moment that makes it one more moment harder to leave

And, another moment of the continued abuse of you.

It’s not your job to fix them. It’s your job to live your life and be the best you.

You need to leave for your kids. You need to leave for your family.

Mostly, you need to leave for You.